Rayudu credits conversations with 'good people' for retirement U-turn

In July 2018, Ambati Rayudu was invited as the guest of honour to an anniversary function in Hyderabad. In stark contrast to what he was supposed to do, which was essentially, talk his audience through the crests and troughs of the life of an international cricketer, he sat there in humble silence watching a dedicated montage. There were questions asked, which he answered quite succinctly. It was hardly the Rayudu you see on the cricket field.

Palpably brazen on the field, he was quite the antithesis off it. So much so, he had not even a smartphone on him at the time, still struggling to wrap his head around Instagram and Twitter and the point of using them - nevermind being an active element - in this day and age of social media.

"I am a very different personality from what I am on the ground," Rayudu tells Cricbuzz. "People who know me well know that. Off the field I hardly get emotional or angry. It's just passion towards the game sometimes that things happen. Everybody is different and you can't have the same kind of people playing the sport. I have my strengths and have my flaws like everybody else.

"Whatever happens on the ground, happens because of the passion with which we play the sport. That has nothing to do with what kind of a person I am. I would say that the more passionate you are, the easier it is to get sometimes carried away, but with age and maturity, all that reduces. I've been far better now than what I was ten years ago.

"As for social media, it has never been my go-to; it hasn't ever interested me. I've always felt that I'm very happy being simple and natural. I can't speak for anyone else but for me, that fame or being in front of the media has never interested me. My love for the sport and what I enjoy doing on the ground is what drives me to play the sport. All the frills and glamour that comes with it don't interest me."

Yet, it was a medium that he resorted to to express his reaction when he didn't find himself a part of the squad for the World Cup 2019. For someone who hasn't still caught up with the idea of having a social profile despite being a public figure, the tweet summed up the extent of his vexation. That, because, he was the supposed solution to India's No. 4 conundrum.

It was in October 2018 that Virat Kohli had vehemently stated that Rayudu was the answer to a question that had been nagging Indian cricket the last few years now. After having tested and tried a number of personnel at the spot, Rayudu seemed to have made it his own following his consistent run of form then and sustained success at that position. And then the tables turned, and how.

"I was very disappointed," Rayudu says. "I mean, anyone would be because I had worked so hard for it. I was very prepared for that specific role at No. 4, but maybe their idea of No. 4 might have changed all of a sudden. Maybe they just wanted something else...I'm not too sure.

"It was very disappointing, but I'm sure they must have had some combinations or plans in mind. I was actually very, very prepared for playing the World Cup to be honest."

Come the announcement of the squad then, an evidently upset Rayudu made headlines for his cheeky tweet about ordering 3D glasses to watch the World Cup. Had that played a part in him not getting picked eventually, despite having been named among the standbys?

Was it something he regretted? "Not at all," he says. "If it comes down to such things...I don't know how to put it, but I don't think that would've played any part. And if it did, I can't imagine what cricketers must be going through honestly.

"I had actually played quite well (leading into the World Cup). You can't play well in every match. It's not possible. It's just that...I was batting well throughout that phase. I don't know... I just feel unfortunate to have missed out."

Unfortunate as it seemed at the point, the final nail in the coffin came when Mayank Agarwal was picked ahead of Rayudu as Vijay Shankar's replacement while the World Cup was underway. It wasn't unnatural for him to think it was the end of the road for him. To compound that, he had announced stepping away from first-class cricket in December 2018 only in the bid to focus on white-ball cricket. When that didn't materialise as planned, he announced his retirement from all forms of cricket, the Indian Premier League included.

"I thought maybe it is time. Because once you work so hard towards something and it does not happen, then you feel it's time to move on and find other things."

But it took all but 58 days for him to backtrack on what was seemingly a quite premature call for retirement that he had made. It wasn't a call entirely shocking either given the manner in which he was snubbed for a spot that was originally pronounced his.

Just shy of two months of that announcement, on being coerced by well-wishers and mentors alike, that included VVS Laxman, Noel David and the CSK management in particular, it was a gradual process towards epiphany of him still having a lot more left to give the game than he had thought.

"Good people have spoken to me and said that maybe it's not the right time. The CSK management, Laxman bhai, Noel bhai were constantly talking to me and I felt eventually that what they said made sense. I felt why should I give up on something that I have worked for 20-odd years to reach where I am. So obviously I thought it over and thought that maybe it's a bit selfish on my part to just move on without giving anything back to the game while I still can play. I am still fit and can still play, so I think maybe it (the decision) was a little hasty."

It was Rayudu's father who had introduced him to cricket at a coaching camp when young. Once he started playing junior cricket for Hyderabad and doing well, was the point where he started enjoying batting. It's how his interest in the sport grew. There he learnt what it meant to compete, and enjoyed the thrill that came as an accomplice. That was his drive at that point. Gradually, that shifted to him wanting to play Ranji Trophy for Hyderabad that drove him with the eventual dream of playing for India the pivot.

If Rayudu would've been asked last year what his driving force was, it would've been wearing the Indian colours at the World Cup. Now that things have veered off that track, he is back to basics - somewhere where he has nothing to prove. Just to himself and going about his job like he always did.

"I've never been the kind to think that I have a point to prove or anything. I'm not really bothered about what people say. It's only been about what I think I can achieve or not. Even if you take the example of playing at 4, I knew I could do it and fulfill that role where you have to be very flexible. And the No. 4 can't be one-dimensional. There are a lot of things like that. Right now though, my focus is on doing well for Hyderabad and CSK."